For the next 14 days I slept for the majority of the day and night. One wouldn’t think that a human could sleep as much as I did within these two weeks however I did and the truth be known if there were more hours in a day then I would have slept them. These days were like being back in the hospital in a semi-conscious, semi-comatose state. Yes, I had my family around me, supporting me, loving me however the feeling of being in a numb state during this time didn’t allow me to acknowledge the love and support that was present.
At the conclusion of a two week period of resting, my mind was still in fight mode to just “build a bridge and get over it” or as most would suggest “to get back on the bike”. My wife however was warning me otherwise for she knew that I was in no state to return to work so I was to take an additional week off work. This time it was suggested by my Doctor to get out of town and find somewhere peaceful where I am not accessible by my work environment. This made a lot of sense for people that are trying to be caring were continually phoning me, dropping around our house etc when I required time to rest and importantly my wife and kids needed space without the external interruptions. It was a terrible time for me for I knew friends were just wanting to see we were all ok and willing to offer a hand where needed however I needed to distance myself from everyone during this time for I was finding everything extremely overwhelming. I constantly had the thought in the back of my mind whether family and friends would understand me pushing them away or would they take offence. I had to take the chance for I was not coping too well.
My wife and youngest son packed up the car and we proceeded down to Shark Bay Western Australia. A great eco-tourism seaside town with a sleepiness feel to it appeared to be the most appropriate place to have time out to heal. As it was, it was a great decision for it allowed me to rest, both of us to talk and grieve about the incident and importantly we conveyed to our son Shay that everything is alright.
On my return to our house in Karratha, whilst my body was still drained of energy, my brain was still driving my body to fight on and get back to work…after all I was ok…or was I?